Pregnant Pause

Sometimes when the universe is at work,

there are both physical and mental situations that arise

to keep you mindful of the practice of caring for yourself, physically, mentally, and emotionally.

I’m a healthy individual, rarely suffering from more than

the occasional allergy attack as the seasons change,

or a “bad tummy” when some food did not make friends with my intestines.

The last time I suffered from the flu, I was a junior in college.

Of course this means, my number was up. I was past due for a visit from the bad virus bugs.

This week I’ve been almost literally brought to my knees by a very nasty gastrointestinal virus.

I don’t think the timing is a coincidence.

The events of the past week have expended tremendous amounts of emotional and mental energy.

I made  a conscious decision to move forward with some

issues that have nipped at my heels like an angry, little dog.

The feelings, anxieties and the fears have finally been faced; acknowledged with astounding gentleness

and grace.

At the same time dreams, long deferred have been revealed and spoken aloud after years of protecting the

broken fragments deep in my heart.

All of this bringing forth, has acted as a catalyst, and releasing these feelings has been a way of purging the past.

I believe my mind, to put it delicately, decided it was time for a cleansing of the body and spirit.

Although I am not exactly comfortable physically, I am finding this time away from most of the daily distractions, quite healing.

This period of illness and change remind me of my pregnancies.

I have become acutely aware, once more, of the most subtle of my body’s signals, sleeping when my eyelids grow heavy, and taking

sips of liquids and nibbling on crackers when my body craves some sustenance.

I’m listening to my body speak to me, of its pains and subtle changes. In the same way I drew inward as the baby made his/her

presence known, I curl into my spirit, taking care of my self, the way I once protected the precious babe inside of me.

© annettealaine-2012

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